Sometimes the people around you forget that the difficult time you're going through is not happening to them. They get so emotionally invested in whatever "challenge" you're facing that it becomes about them and how they feel about it. What's worse is when you point out that this challenge is yours to face they act like you've got no idea what they're going through. (Hot tip here for emotional vampires - you're not going through it. I am.)
Well guess what. I'm not here to help you get through MY trauma. Damn it. I'm mad. When I got divorced, it was hijacked by a particular person in my life. Lets call them A. A's friends were sending her flowers because I was getting divorced and it was so hard on HER. Never mind that I couldn't sleep, eat, think or function, lost 30 kilos and became dangerously malnourished, suffered panic attacks that required medication. She felt sad about it and needed extra support. (Munchausen Syndrome anyone???)
I'm now going through another challenging time. And A is at it again. Hijacking my trauma and making it about them. It's gobsmackingly awful. On top of the challenge I'm facing A is accusing me of not caring enough to do anything about the trauma and that they are the only ones who truly care. As. If. (Just because I don't throw crockery at the walls does not mean I don't care - it means I can't afford new crockery.)
I'm dealing with my challenge in the most practical and responsible way available to me. I have sought and received expert help and am proceeding according to the experts advice. However A has assured me that the experts have it wrong and that only A knows how to handle it. Despite A never having even remotely coming close to knowing what this challenge is about. But hell, what do I know, I'm just living it.
In 2011 I came to the realisation that there was someone in my life, who shouldn't be, who still found a way to emotionally abuse and manipulate me. I put an end to my part in that relationship. Unfortunately, the situation escalated because the other person involved is not happy that I will not tolerate the abuse anymore.
I realised that A is doing the same in some respects. But in 2012 I'm not accepting that behaviour from anyone anymore and I stood up to A. It was difficult. It was horrible. The situation has escalated into a horrible fight. So I'm dealing with challenge upon challenge at the moment.
Yet I remain positive, because in among the challenges that I'm facing I'm finding a strength in the face of adversity I didn't know I was capable of feeling. (I wonder how Wonder Woman's bracelets would look on my wrists? Pretty effing awesome I reckon...)
Don't hijack my drama because you have none. Bloody be grateful you don't have any. And leave me to deal with mine the way I want to or for chrissakes get an effing hobby. This is my journey, my drama, my choice, my mistake to make, my triumph to celebrate - because this is MY life.
